And before you know it…

Bianca! Bailey!-

How are my top two favorite people on this earth (not counting Barack Obama, Katy Perry and Eric Bana) doing? I miss you guys so much! Truly, I’ve forgotten what you two look like. It’s been THAT long. I hope your holiday shenanigans were absolutely incredible and haven’t left you with too many holiday pounds that you’ll have to burn off in the new year (I’m up 4, but who’s counting – oh yeah – ME).

Yesterday was my first day back to work after the (much needed) long winter break. Believe it or not, I was actually really excited to come back to work and see my students. It’s hard not to get attached to the little buggers. I mean, during the school year I see them more than their parents do!

In any event, we’ve been doing a lot of fun, new technology based activites as part of my professional resolution to use technology as much as possible. My kids are social networking, BLOGGING and practicing flashcards online. Woot woot! With all the excitement and new activities, the kids have been extremely well behaved and I haven’t been hating my job! (I know it’s only day 2 back, but whatever.) With all their great behavior and bright and shiny smiles I know
you’ll be just as baffled as I am with what I overheard in the lunch line. Here’s the scoop:

I’m walking my students down to get their delicious(?) and nutritious(?) school lunch. Normally I just drop them off at the end of the hall and they go on their merry way to the cafeteria, but I had some students that needed to stay in recess (for being bad) so I had to hand deliver a note to the behavior gal in the lunch room. Just as I’m walking in behind a student I hear, “Ya! Ya! And before you know it they’re sucking your dick for smarties.”

I’m serious. This came out of a fourth grader. A 10 year old. Probably the smallest, teeniest one that you could possibly confuse with a second grader.

[Pausing so you can pick up your jaw and wrap your mind around that one.]

Honestly. I didn’t know what to do. Seriously, what do you say to that?! How do you punish that? How do you explain why that is inappropriate to a TEN YEAR OLD?!  I just passed him off to the behavior lady and told her he said something really inappropriate because I didn’t know what else to do.

I have two reactions:

1) WTF!?!?!?!?! How did he learn that? Does he actually know what that means? Where did he hear it? Why did he choose smarties? Are there really elementary school girls doing that? And for smarties?

2) Pretty impressed that this child has two different vocabularies. One that he uses in my classroom and one that he uses everywhere else. I mean, that’s a pretty good skill for a 10 year old. I know have two vocabularies – one for teaching and one for everything else, but I’m twenty middle. I think it’s pretty impressive that he’s able to filter himself so well that I would never know he has such a mouth on him.

Figuring out how to tell his (Spanish speaking) mother,


Filed under Bridget

10 responses to “And before you know it…

  1. I taught 34 years inner city high school Miami, Florida. Drive-bys are not uncommon and crack rules the night. The is a district of over 425,000. We average at least 125 weapons arrests a year. I would offer that at least half the girls in my 11th grade classes carried a single edge razor. I’ve seen kids unload worse than that in first grade. Become oblivious to it, but insist “we” do not speak like that in the classroom. I was too busy worrying about preempting a fight or something than to care about profanity. I’ve seen far too may parents speak to their children that way. Like “I told yo little MFing A, to stay in that GD chair. What do we expect?

  2. There are some advantages to living in Yeaman, one of them being we could never hear a sentence like this from the moths of babes (the little kind). The main reason being we don’t have Smarties here.

    Glad to see you back, m’dear.

  3. Um. WOW. Kids these days… I would have thought they’d at least hold out for M&M’s. Or a Hershey’s bar.

    Happy New Year ladies 🙂

  4. justmarriedgirl

    (1) Congrats on getting your students to keep blogs. I tried it with mine, and it failed miserably. Sigh. What is your secret?

    (2) My first reaction was to be appalled. I have a six year old nephew, and I don’t want to think that he’ll be talking fellatio in four years. But, I guess I’m not that surprised about the language. I just can’t believe those girls would give it up for smarties. Looks like I’ll have to have the sex talk with my little one once s/he hits pre-school.

    • (1) They LOVE it! I present it as a super fun activity and let them know that anyone (including their mothers, me and peers) can read what they’re writing. Also – I make alternative activities not as appealing. (Example: “Your choice for tonight’s homework is to post a blog or do this handy dandy worksheet on long division with remainders.” OR “Let’s all get online and post a blog about what we just learned in class. Or you can practice cursive.”

      (2) I’m still in shocked. I now I have this morbid curiosity about what they know and what they REALLY talk about. It’s scary.

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