Bianca’s Off to Mexico!

GOOD MORNING!
 
It certainly is a good morning for me. Although this may be the longest day of my life, because as you know, I’m going to Playa Del Carmen tomorrow! Did I mention I’m going on a spectacular tropical vacation tomorrow? Oh that’s right, I just did. Silly me. The hours are just crawling by like a turtle. It’s tortoise speed torture.
 
Is it weird that I’m already feeling depressed about coming back from my fabulous vacation that I may or may not have rubbed in your face? (This is kind of like that silly drink you got in Las Vegas that you whined about it not wanting to be over after your first sip.) I know that is backwards seeing as I haven’t even left yet, but thinking about the trip ending and having to come back to work just makes me so sad. I want to island hop for my career. Are there jobs available in that field? Professional Island Hoppers? Think about THAT. I could have business cards that play calypso music like on those greeting cards. My e-mail would have a permanent out-of-office reply. Business casual would mean putting clothes on… I’m going to look in to that.
 
Do you realize this is the first major vacation I’m taking without you in more than a year and a half? Yes, I’ve been to Sun Valley here and San Diego there without you on a few occasions, and you recently went to Sin City with Mr. Algebra, but week-long-out-of-the-country trips? That’s our thing. How am I supposed to explore this place without my favorite partner in crime (this is a term I’m trying to replace, FYI)?!? I have a feeling Preston isn’t going to enjoy flirting with foreigners while drinking mojitos on the beach as much as you do. And as you know, I enjoy that very much. I’m going to miss my best friend, but will keep you updated with absurdly expensive international text messages. Make sure to tweet for me while I’m gone.
 
So we all love my dad, Papa Vanderstappen. His nerdy bike shorts, his love of Seinfeld and the Beatles, and most of all his surprising Liberal views on the world. It is rare that we see a baby boomer physician who supports the left. A liberal yourself, you and my Dad get along very well. Planned Parenthood and Social Program supporters, the three of us just understand the world. But let me tell you where this all starts to deviate… When issues of said baby boomer concern his daughter (me). With all of his modern contemporary views, he still will not let Preston and I sleep in the same bed. When I come visit, Jon and Cece* sleep in the same bed but Preston and I have to sleep in different beds, on different floors of the house. The point of all this is, what are we supposed to do in Playa? The sleeping arrangements haven’t been discussed, and if my dad’s rules apply in foreign countries, are Jon and Preston seriously supposed to share a hotel room? We really have to play it like we’re the Cleavers? I just don’t understand. He has to know that his little bunny is not a virgin anymore. We’ve been together for 5 years and we don’t follow the gospel. Papa V arrives first and is checking us all in, so when we get there, I guess we’ll see. The anticipation is killing me. I’ll keep you posted on the sitch.
 
We’ll have a lot to talk about when I get back. I am so jealous that I don’t get to take the “fun bus” with the DramaWhores tonight like you. You are going to have a blast in Bendover, Nevada. Enjoy black jack, smoking inside and free cocktails tonight, my dear. And most importantly, don’t get abducted.
 
PS: Mani-Pedi’s at 3? I think I’m going to work a half-day today as per usual. I love my job.
 
 
LOVE AND PINA COLADAS,
 
Bianca. xoxo
 
*Jon is Bianca’s older brother, Cece is his girlfriend. Note: Their names have been changed. Kind of.

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Filed under Dramawhores, Mexico, Vacation, wendover

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